Sister Jorgensen and I.
April 10, 2012:
Easter Week
Well hello again everyone :)
This week was so hard on my spirit. So many nights I'd be praying and Mappi would come to mind, and all I wanted to do was to call Mommy and to hear her voice and to hear Daddy tell me everything would be alright. I'm so grateful I have a Heavenly Father who loves me and sends me peace when I so desperately need it. I didn't sleep Monday to Wednesday. I woke up literally every half an hour or so thinking about Mappi and about my investigators, and how I really needed to sleep, because I can't take naps here. I was so tired. And I had no time to mourn her loss. I think we as a human race naturally desire a time period to mourn a loss. But we don't have that here; I just had to get up and go to work every morning. I just had to buckle down and push through it. On Thursday, I texted President and told him that I read in the white handbook that I'm supposed to let him know if there's an emergency in the family, and that it wasn't an emergency, but that someone very close in my family died, and that I wasn't sleeping, but that I was working hard. And then I thanked him for all he does and called it good. He texted back later that night and said, "So sorry to hear your news. You are a wonderful missionary. Do your best, you are in our thoughts and prayers. Let me know if you need to talk." I never called President, but one day I was so close to just calling Sister Irwin and crying with her on the phone. Why do we just need someone to love so much when we go through hard times? All I wanted was a shoulder to cry on, a familiar voice, but I recognize that this experience is going to help me later on in life. I got through it. I pushed through it. Heavenly Father helped me get through the days. It really was a miracle. He pushed me, He helped me. I realized that although Grandma and Vicky have died, and those deaths have been hard on me, that Mappi was someone I knew so well, because I was blessed to have so much time with her. I realized that this is the first real death I've had to deal with, and that's probably part of why it's been so hard on me. I prayed like a maniac all week. And I told Heavenly Father that I really needed His help. I faced the week knowing that I couldn't really push the way I usually do--but somehow Heavenly Father did the pushing for me.
Easter Week
Well hello again everyone :)
This week was so hard on my spirit. So many nights I'd be praying and Mappi would come to mind, and all I wanted to do was to call Mommy and to hear her voice and to hear Daddy tell me everything would be alright. I'm so grateful I have a Heavenly Father who loves me and sends me peace when I so desperately need it. I didn't sleep Monday to Wednesday. I woke up literally every half an hour or so thinking about Mappi and about my investigators, and how I really needed to sleep, because I can't take naps here. I was so tired. And I had no time to mourn her loss. I think we as a human race naturally desire a time period to mourn a loss. But we don't have that here; I just had to get up and go to work every morning. I just had to buckle down and push through it. On Thursday, I texted President and told him that I read in the white handbook that I'm supposed to let him know if there's an emergency in the family, and that it wasn't an emergency, but that someone very close in my family died, and that I wasn't sleeping, but that I was working hard. And then I thanked him for all he does and called it good. He texted back later that night and said, "So sorry to hear your news. You are a wonderful missionary. Do your best, you are in our thoughts and prayers. Let me know if you need to talk." I never called President, but one day I was so close to just calling Sister Irwin and crying with her on the phone. Why do we just need someone to love so much when we go through hard times? All I wanted was a shoulder to cry on, a familiar voice, but I recognize that this experience is going to help me later on in life. I got through it. I pushed through it. Heavenly Father helped me get through the days. It really was a miracle. He pushed me, He helped me. I realized that although Grandma and Vicky have died, and those deaths have been hard on me, that Mappi was someone I knew so well, because I was blessed to have so much time with her. I realized that this is the first real death I've had to deal with, and that's probably part of why it's been so hard on me. I prayed like a maniac all week. And I told Heavenly Father that I really needed His help. I faced the week knowing that I couldn't really push the way I usually do--but somehow Heavenly Father did the pushing for me.
Our Church building in Jičín.
I know my emotions were a little broken. But that just goes to show that when you work hard, when you put your all into something... God knows when things will be hard, and He already has a plan to help you accomplish what you set out to accomplish. He's promised us He will help us, and this week He proved His promise. I went through my old letters, and I found those from Mappi. I felt peace as I read them and as I held them close to me. It is so comforting to hold a hand-made letter. To know she held it, and she picked it out for me and wrote all those things; somehow I felt connected to her. And in General Conference one of the speakers said that we need to always take the time to write hand written letters to those we love; emails don't do the same thing, and I was so grateful right then that I had those letters from Mappi. What if I only had emails to hold to? Lame. So I'm so grateful she and I had this time to write back and forth. It is a blessing, another one of the many, of me being on a mission. I have some beautiful things to remember her by, words to hold onto, and feelings to feel. It's a beautiful thing, this life. And I am so happy I got the chance to be a part of hers, to have known her and to have felt her love. She is greatly missed. I wish I could just come and hug you all, but know you are in my prayers as I know I am in yours.
Our Church building in Jičín.
General Conference addressed death a little bit, and earlier on Friday I realized that I already felt better--not all the way, but I felt at peace. The gospel had been my balm of Gilead. And it didn’t make me sad when they talked about it. I was happy. I was happy that Heavenly Father got to be with Mappi again, and that she was at peace and she was with her family again. Death is just a doorway--going from one room to the next. This week was full of reflection, and I am grateful I had it. It was hard to be away from familiarity while going through this. It was hard to not have anyone to hug or hold or cry to. But Heavenly Father sure got a lot of phone calls from me. I am stronger because of this. We always can learn from the hard times. I know this to be true.
This upcoming Friday [one of our investigators] is getting baptized :). He just had his baptismal interview, and he is all ready. He is really excited, and we are excited for him. We went over to our new [Branch] Mission Leader’s home yesterday and talked about the baptism and asked if he'd do the baptizing. We got there all ready with the whole program filled out and ready to go with people confirmed for participating, and that made me happy, because now he knows we can get things done. There will be a musical number, talks, and then we will teach the Restoration [of the Gospel] after the baptism while they are changing their clothes. It's going to be wonderful. It will be held at a pool in a nearby city, so everyone is carpooling up. It's been wonderful getting everyone all excited and involved.
This upcoming Friday [one of our investigators] is getting baptized :). He just had his baptismal interview, and he is all ready. He is really excited, and we are excited for him. We went over to our new [Branch] Mission Leader’s home yesterday and talked about the baptism and asked if he'd do the baptizing. We got there all ready with the whole program filled out and ready to go with people confirmed for participating, and that made me happy, because now he knows we can get things done. There will be a musical number, talks, and then we will teach the Restoration [of the Gospel] after the baptism while they are changing their clothes. It's going to be wonderful. It will be held at a pool in a nearby city, so everyone is carpooling up. It's been wonderful getting everyone all excited and involved.
Jičín Branch members with Easter whips.
So on Easter here they have an interesting tradition where the boys go around on Monday with funny whips made out of stick things and ribbons. They whack you on the bum and sing you songs (they do this to the females), and then the females give them candy. There is a rhyme that goes to it, and it is supposed to give you fertility and luck, hahaha, so funny. So anyway, President told us that we can’t participate, but yesterday one of the leaders here called us and asked if we were home. I said ‘yes’ and he said, “Great, my kids will be over in a minute.” Hahah, so we called President, and President told us that we can’t participate, but we can take pictures. So we go outside, and all the Branch boys start whacking us, and I have a video kind of, haha, and then the Branch leader whacked me on the rear end, and, oh my word, I was laughing so hard, and then he (because I had texted him telling him we can’t participate) said (while whacking me), “What do you mean you can’t participate? You don't do the whipping!” Hahaha, oh my gosh. So whatever. We got Czech whipped.
Jičín Branch members and us with Easter whips.
And it was cute and fine and cultural. And then we took pictures. I also bought five whips on the market. I want to put them in a flower vase every Easter when I get home and remember my mission. They are so cool! And I bought some real eggs that are painted and carved :). We'll see how I figure out how to transport them... haha. Oh and when I bought them I stuck them in some water to keep them fresh like the markets do, and then when I came home there were leaves growing out the top of my whips! Way funny. I'll have to trim them up a bit!
Czech pottery.
Yesterday we had a Family Home Evening at a member’s home with [our investigator] and his new friend whom we are teaching. Anyway, [our investigator has a ring that looks a little scary and] we were there, and the little son (we asked him to give one of the talks at the baptism--I'm excited) said, "You know, you can get a CTR (Choose the Right) ring and replace [your other ring] if you want. It would help you choose the right." It was PERFECT! From the mouths of babes....
Well, I love you all. The work is good, and it goes forward. In my blessing before I left I was reminded to always remember that through the success I see I must stay humble and know that the Lord leads the work. This week I realized that, once again. You are all in my prayers. I love you all!
Sestra Satu
Well, I love you all. The work is good, and it goes forward. In my blessing before I left I was reminded to always remember that through the success I see I must stay humble and know that the Lord leads the work. This week I realized that, once again. You are all in my prayers. I love you all!
Sestra Satu